Sex & Relationship

What Are 5 Love Languages And How Can They Help My Relationship?

How Functional Are The Five Love Languages?

By now, you’ve already realized that people mean different things when they say “I love you” on the best dating sites 2021. But dating sites aside, do you show affection to your partner? If your answer is yes, think about how well you offer it to them.

Can you honestly say that your partner knows how you feel about them? If your answer is still a solid yes, we’re envious. But sometimes, regardless of how much you say you adore your partner, they may not feel it unless you express it in a way they understand. 

Hence the need to look into the different love languages to ensure your partner knows precisely how you feel. So, are love languages real? They are, and very much so. Dr. Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor, developed this concept because he saw a pattern in his notes from the couples he was counseling.

Let’s take a look at the five love languages and what they are.

Love Languages
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1. Quality Time

Let’s talk about how to show quality time. Here, you give your partner your undivided attention. This way, they feel like you are focused on them and that you are present in the moment you’re sharing. Quality time is relative to you and your partner. For instance, it can actively listen to your partner with your tablet switched off, silently reading books together, or playing a sport you love together.

2. Words of Affirmation

One of the other love languages in Dr. Chapman’s book “The Five Love Languages” is words of affirmation. If this method is how someone understands they are appreciated, they enjoy spoken words of encouragement, appreciation, romantic messages, and praise.

3.  Acts of Service

If your primary love language is acts of service, you feel appreciated and adored when people do nice things for you. These include things like helping with the chores or filling up the gas tank for you.

4. Physical Touch

By now, you have an idea of how love languages affect the perception of affection for different people. People who prefer physical touch feel affection from their partner when they are physically close. They like cuddling, holding hands, massages, and much more.

Read More: Nice Guy Syndrome: Things you should Fix before it’s too late

5. Receiving Gifts

People whose primary love language is receiving gifts treasure their gifts and the effort and time it took to get the gift. If your partner’s love language is receiving gifts, you should know they won’t always expect expensive or large gifts. It’s the thought that counts.

Are love languages how you show love? Yes. There may be some confusion in your relationship if you express affection to your partner, but they don’t reciprocate. This indicates that they don’t understand the love language you’re displaying. Understanding their primary love language will help you explore better ways of expressing your affection to them.

Can different love languages work? Yes. Your partner may use one love language to express their adoration and affection and another to show how they prefer to receive it.

Love Languages
Image source – Canva

How The Love Languages Can Help Your Relationship

  • Encourages intimacy: the love languages can help couples learn more about each other while promoting understanding and connection in more meaningful and more profound ways. 
  • Promotion of empathy and encourages selflessness: couples who strive to learn each other’s love languages are more likely to put others’ needs ahead of their own. This allows them to step out of their heads and make someone else feel needed and appreciated.
  • Promotion of personal growth: learning the five love languages is a great way to grow. You give attention to someone else rather than yourself, and you stop being self-absorbed. Once you start loving people in ways that you aren’t used to or are out of your comfort zone, you learn to change and grow.
  • Sharing of love more meaningfully: Once partners learn and begin to speak each other’s love languages, they become more conscious of how their actions or words can be more meaningful to each other. They help partners show affection in a way their partner will appreciate.

If you’ve experienced a change in how your partner reciprocates your intentions to show affection, you’re probably thinking, “Why do love languages change.” Just like the relationship itself, the people in it grow and change. As they do this, so do their needs.


Love languages are a critical aspect of any relationship. Before choosing a partner, think about what love languages work best together. Determining what love languages are most compatible will help you determine how you can use them to make your relationship better. Do you believe love languages are a good way of expressing affection to your partner? What’s yours?

Author’s bio:

Miranda Davis is a freelance writer in the relation and psychology area. Miranda is interested in such topics as building healthy relationships between people, love/sex compatibility, and how to find the right balance in life in general. She is currently doing specific research on the topic. Miranda loves cooking and long-distance walking.

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