Teaching Children to Advocate for Themselves in Medical Settings
It's something that often goes unnoticed until you're actually there, sitting in the clinic with your child, and you realise
It’s something that often goes unnoticed until you’re actually there, sitting in the clinic with your child, and you realise they have no real sense of what’s expected of them or whether they’re even allowed to ask questions. They might be anxious about what’s coming, or simply unsure of their role in the whole process, and often they just stay quiet. The appointment might go smoothly enough from a medical standpoint, but there’s something missing in terms of their participation. And honestly, it’s not just about the jab or the check-up. It’s the talking part. The saying “I don’t understand” or “That hurts” or even just “Can I have a minute?”. That’s the bit we don’t always teach.
Whether it’s your own child or a young person you’re caring for, especially foster children, who may have had a fair few medical visits already, it can make a real difference when they feel like they’re allowed to speak up. Not just allowed, but encouraged, supported, and given the words and the space.
It’s Not Just About Being Brave
This whole idea of self-advocacy is not about making kids tough or turning them into mini adults who can navigate the NHS like pros. It’s more about giving them a sense of ownership and helping them feel like they’re not just a passive passenger in their own healthcare journey.
Sometimes, especially with children fostered with an agency like Active Care Solutions, there’s a bit of a history there, where lots of adults were taking the lead, doing the talking, and making the decisions. Understandably so, of course. And yet, over time, it can leave a child feeling like their voice doesn’t carry much weight. So, when a doctor asks, “How are you feeling?” and the child looks at you instead, it’s not just shyness; it might be habit.
Letting Them Try Things Out
One small, gentle way in is just to practise at home, in the car, even while waiting for the appointment. Ask things like “What do you want to ask the doctor today?” or “How would you explain that pain you’ve been having?” You don’t need to turn it into a roleplay session or anything formal. Just little nudges that let them know it’s okay to speak, and that their opinion actually matters.
And if they get it wrong or freeze up? That’s fine too. It’s not about getting it perfect. It’s a bit like learning to order your own food at a café (remember how big that felt the first time?). It takes time, and a bit of wobbling is all part of it.
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Doctors Are People Too
It can help to remind kids that medical professionals aren’t these scary, all-knowing beings. They’re just people, and they don’t expect children to know the right words. A simple, “It hurts here,” or “I feel funny when I run,” is more than enough. The goal isn’t to turn every child into a confident patient overnight; it’s more about planting the seed, letting them know they can speak, and that someone will listen.
Honestly, if they can learn to speak up about a sore throat, who knows, next time it might be maths homework or a tricky friendship, and that will help them immensely.
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