Don’t judge a book by its cover. As every coin has two sides every situation has two faces.
In our lives also we come across numerous people who exhibit different kinds of nature. Never judge a person without trying to understand his or her views.
Read this story to trust this better
Once there was a bird that was looking for a shelter to lay her eggs in the upcoming rainy season. She saw two trees and approached them. The first tree denied her shelter. She was disappointed and went to the second tree. The second tree accepted her. She built a nest and laid her eggs in that tree.
Soon, the rainy season arrived and the rain was so heavy that, the first tree fell and was carried away by its flow.
Then the bird exclaimed that the tree had fallen because he had denied her shelter. It was karma and he had to pay for his deeds.
Then the tree replied that it was not karma. He knew that he had grown weak and would not be able to survive this rainy season. Thus he had said “no” to save the life of the birds and her children.
The bird had tears in her eyes and now she knew the reason and had respect in her mind for the tree.
Moral: We should not consider someone’s “No” as their arrogance. We must respect the decision of others whether it is in our favor or not. You never know the full picture. There is usually more to the story than we see. We get so engrossed in our problems that we forget to view other’s points.
We must not consider someone arrogance based on our perspective. The hidden truth might be different. Therefore, we must be open-minded and try to understand the real motive before making a judgment and forming our views about him or her.
The first and foremost thing is that if someone refuses you for something- Don’t panic. Anger takes away your intellect. Say “It’s OK” and try to understand the situation and the viewpoint of the other.
Keep calm and listen to his story. Try to find out the reason that made him do so. The unseen reason might be very convincing then it will not bother you anymore and help you come out of the wrath and disappointment
Try to see the situation from a different angle. If you look from others’ viewpoints you might find that the “No” was obvious. Never judge a person instantly without thinking rationally and going into the depth of the reason.
Most of the conflicts occur because of the gap between technical rightness and practical rightness. Technical rightness is what we see and practical rightness is what is right but is beyond is our vision.
Big or small, rejection affects us all. Now arises a question of how to deal with the rejection.
Rejection may be faced in any form like – Rejection at work, rejection by your first love, or rejection by parents. Whatever is it, rejection hurts. Getting rejected must not be taken as the end of all, rather, one must learn from the experience and come out stronger. These tips will help you face rejection and reduce its fear:
Read more: Learning When Not To Speak is an Art
1. Acknowledge the emotion:
First, understand the situation and recognize yourself. Don’t be carried away and be in the present and true to evaluate the possible reasons. Acknowledge yourself and your true feelings. Face the situation head-on and learn to deal with the pain. A pain ignored once, cannot be cured for a lifetime.
2. Be positive:
Only optimism and courage can help to achieve goals. The setbacks should not leave you depressed forever. There is always a ray of hope. People who are positive and who keep on trying will someday or the other achieve the desired results.
3. Use rejection to your advantage:
Grow stronger and become better. You must learn from the happenings of life. Use rejection as an opportunity to move forward with wisdom. Whether it is at the office or in personal life.
Judging is an action
No action is right or wrong
All that matters is the center from where the action is arising.
It is not wrong to judge. But before you judge someone the judgment must be unbiased and backed up by the right perspective taking into consideration all the prevalent factors.
Before judging someone we must:
Monitor our thoughts: The waves of our mind largely determines our behavior. Also before pointing a finger at someone else; look within.
Look for the positive: The key to a happy life is to think positively. Look at the bright side of the story. It will enable you to grow faster and take better decisions in life. If we think positively, the entire world seems to be good and loving. Everything in life will happen for a good reason hidden behind it.
Avoid stereotypes: The stereotypes built by society are just myths and should be ignored. They just give rise to negative thoughts and hinder growth. Wrong and misleading decisions and judgements of life can be avoided by putting down the set stereotypes.
Focus on your own life: Focus on what you want and what is your ultimate aim. It doesn’t matter who is doing what. The only thing that matters is your efforts. Action always speaks louder than words. One ought to concentrate on his aim and the way to achieve it. Anyone coming in its way should be ignored.
Like, you can take the example of a newly wedded couple.
The wife planned for an outing and called the husband to take her to a dinner date. The husband surprisingly said “No”. The wife got upset and started saying that the husband didn’t love her. She didn’t talk to him all day. At night when he came home she saw that he was badly hurt and was hospitalized for the whole day. That is why he had denied her. He didn’t want to tell her the reason on the phone as that might frighten her. The wife felt guilty for her thoughts.
Never judge a person without knowing the obvious reason behind it. Not all that is visible is always true. Learn from the facts and try to be polite and patient with everyone. Some rejections are for your good. Create your destiny with your positive thoughts and statements.
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