Predict your married life via asking these questions, if you are opting for an arranged marriage
Indians are fond of marriages. And among these, arranged marriage is still a very popular concept in India. There are 3 ways an arranged marriage could happen.
- The first way is the sweet old custom of pressurizing people to get married.
- The second is when your parents tell you, “Beta, you are now of the marriageable age”. And they even make you feel the same. The reasons for his feeling could be either your peer group of the same age are getting married, or some failed relationships in the past had forced you to do so.
- Situation number three is when the girl has taken the responsibility of arranging her wedding because no one even seems to be bothered about her marriage. In the process you may land up on matrimonial sites, chatting with potential grooms, and also with their parents.
However, there are some disadvantages to arranged marriage too. This disadvantage includes that you do not know the person to whom you are committing to spend your whole life. And that is a scary thought for most brides.
So, what should we do?
Here are 6 questions to ask all prospective grooms in arrange marriage. This will help you analyse what your life will look like with your future Pati.
Question 1: Are you expecting dowry in any form?
The groom should ideally be against all forms of dowry. As per reports, 20 women die every day due to dowry harassment.
Question 2: Who all are there in your house and how is your relationship with them?
You can ask questions related to his parents, extended family, and questions around his family.
After this, you might find out if he is too dependent on them. And are his parents too possessive? Do they make all the decisions for him? Try to figure out if he will stand up for you if there is a fallout with his parents.
If his parents are too controlling, they might try to control you too.
On the other hand, if his parents are loving and accepting towards him, chances are there that they might be loving and accepting towards you too.
Also, try to ask some questions if there are any disputes in his family. You may restrict yourself before nosing into someone’s family affair but nobody likes to settle in that family where there are lots of disputes.
This is important for your mental health and peace.
Question 3: Once you find out how many people are there in his family, ask him who handles all the household chores?
From making food to cleaning the house, who does these things? Would you expect me to do it all?
Ask him if he knows how to make food?
Cooking and cleaning is a basic life skill, and your future husband must know of them. He should not be completely dependent on you for making food or managing the house.
Question 4: If you are a working woman and would like to continue working after marriage, just tell him directly that you will continue to work. Is he okay with it?
Tell him about your work, working hours. If your job requires you to travel to cities that are open about him. Share your ambitions, work goals.
Question 5: Kids! kids! And kids!
Tell him whatsoever you feel about kids. If you want to become a mother in the 1st year of marriage or if you are someone who is still finishing your higher education or wants to focus on her work, be honest about it.
Also, like him, whatever gender the baby is born with, how would he react if it turns out to be a third gender?
Question 6: Why does he want to get married?
Is he ready for marriage? As a future husband and wife, it is important to openly talk about your reasons for getting married. Is it a partnership, family pressure, rebound after a breakup, or is he just looking for someone who could take care of him and the house?
You just ask these questions to your potential groom and see whether it works out for you or not.