Sex & Relationship

Green Flags in a Relationship: Dating Coach reveals how to consciously spot them!

Green Flags to look for in a Romantic Relationship, Don’t just always discuss Red Flags

In an era of heartbreaks, lack of trust and never ending search for solid relationships, it becomes extremely difficult to notice green flags in a relationship. Every time you open your social media or talk to a friend, you get a plethora of content on how to spot red flags. But why don’t we talk about Green Flags? Why don’t we tell people to keep a close check on green flags? Today, we will talk about Green Flags in a relationship. We all know that apart from the emotional bond that we create with our friends and family, romantic relationships are one of the most fulfilling aspects of our life.

Read More- Red Flag Alert! Is Someone Breadcrumbing You?

We all need someone who can understand us well and stick to us when the time gets tough. However, dating these days has completely changed, but my friend Love remains the same. Woh Kehte hai Na Mohabbat Na toh badli hai na badlegi! You might have experienced failed relationships in your life but that doesn’t mean you should not give love another chance. And when we say that – It also means spotting Green Flags whenever you meet someone new.

Recently, people on Quora talked about How to Spot Green Flags in a Relationship and we decided to reach out to a dating coach and understand Green Flags. Well, if you are currently seeing someone, this article might come handy.  In the era of Red Flags, Kiseke Green Flag Bano! All you need is – “Pay Attention”!

A Delhi based Dating coach Supriya Tandon said, “One needs to understand relationships take time. You need to nurture it with care, trust, love and communication. Dating has completely changed and we often only spot red flags. If spotting an unhealthy relationship in the beginning is important, then it is extremely important to spot the green flags right from the beginning. Without any further ado, let us take a look at the points she highlighted.

They will make a great partner if they are a Good Listener

Someone who listens to you calmly will always make a great partner. Today, nobody actually listens. If they lend you their ears and keep minute details of your conversation in mind, then it is a big yes! If they ask thoughtful questions, make space for meaningful conversations and try to know about your inner well, those are big green flags. Active listening increases the emotional intimacy among partners.  If someone listens to you actively, then they will be able to hear you in the moment of conflicts as well and try to understand your side of the story too.

When they talk about their feeling honestly

Another Green Flag that you must consider – Are they communicating their feelings honestly? Be it things that they like or things they don’t like. If they are self -aware about their emotions. Be it fears, hopes, dreams and patterns, if they know what they want, they will make great partners. They will be able to recognize issues and will also be aware when they are contributing to it.

Okay! Supriya also pointed out that consistency is another big Green Flag!

Adding to this point she said, “ I have dealt with many clients who revealed that after a certain point their partner lost interest. There were many cases when someone bombarded the client with love and gifts in the beginning but was not good at resolving issues.”  Now, if someone makes plans, text you back, show up when promised and generally show an active interest and are not scared to tell you that they like you – Then it is a big Green Flag.  However, Supriya said that effort should be made from both sides. In a serious relationship, one you should show up every damn day. There should be equal give and take from both the parties.

It feels easy Like Breathing

You don’t have to always think about how to make them happy? It is as easy as breathing. The pace of the relationship is comfortable and you need not to push your boundaries. You both enjoy your personal space and enjoy each other’s company when together.  There is never a pressure or attempts to forcibly escalate the intensity of a relationship before you are ready.

They are willing to be Vulnerable

Someone who holds their cards close to their chest may not be able to form deep intimacy with you. Someone who opens about their feelings, candidly shares how they feel about and let you in are the ones who will make you feel secure in a relationship. You will be able to share anything and everything with them. Supriya reveals that it is important for people to take emotional risks and open themselves up to the possibility of love or rejection. A person who is not emotionally unavailable is not a bad person but it means they are preventing this particular relationship from deepening.

They are Kind in General

They care about your feelings and well –being and kind to you in every situation. They are kind even if you cancel the plan at the last moment or you leave for an urgent meeting without informing them. Kind people are the best people. They know relationships are much more important than just winning a particular argument.

They believe in Constructive Criticism

When we love someone that doesn’t mean we love everything about them. No one is perfect and we need to accept this fact when it comes to dating. We actually love a person for all the perfection and imperfection they have. However, some people do not take criticism well.  But if someone values your feedback and tries to be the better version of themselves, then that’s a big Green Flag!

If you love being around each other and bring out the best in each other, and the vast majority that you spend together brings pleasure and comfort, then it’s a Green Flag!

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Parul Srivastava

She likes to express herself through her write-ups. She doesn’t believe in doing different things but she enjoy doing things differently.
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