Care VS Control: Read to know are you being controlled or they just care for you?
Care VS Control : Do you find yourself trapped behind the bars of your partner’s orders? Being in a relationship where all you need to do is say ‘yes’ to whatever your partner says can be frustrating. It is a red flag that you might not consider a red flag because you love them. A lot of people love to control their partner and the majority of people get confused between care and control. Your partner controlling nature can drain you emotionally.
We often get confused between care and control. But love is never controlling. Period. Read the article to know are you being controlled or they just care for you. Their genuine care can turn into control and you must know how to set a boundary.
If you notice these signs in your relationship, it’s time to take a call from your heart.
- You find yourself isolated from friends and family: You rely only on him /her and him /her alone. Your world revolves around their decisions and demands. Your networks of friends and family have suddenly vanished. All you do is just pay attention to their needs. Partners who think they can claim you and separate you from your own world can never be trusted.
- Flattering possessiveness turned Jealousy: At first, their jealousy was appealing because it showed how much they love you, but with the passage of time it turned dark and twisty. Now, your partner always has doubts about your activities and they regard those normal conversations as flirting. Due to their insecurities now you don’t have good relationships with your friends.
- No right to Privacy: They always want to know where you are going, when you will return, who you are texting, what you are saying, and every plan that you are making. They will look through your purse, snoop through your emails, sneak peek at your phone. They feel they have the right to know everything about you.
Perhaps he or she checks your phone, logs into your email or constantly tracks your internet history and then, justifies this by saying If you are not doing anything wrong, then you shouldn’t mind showing me. It’s a violation of your privacy and a police-like presence within your relationship.
- A view without a point:If you express an opinion or belief, they shut you down or ignore you. Nothing you say is relevant unless you echo your controlling partner’s exact opinions or thoughts. They dominate a conversation, interrupt you with whatever you have said. They have an opinion on everything, from your outings to your clothing. If you try to point him wrong they make you feel guilty
- Availability: You always have to be available for him/her even if you are out with friends or want to spend a day by yourself. Even if you are having dinner with friends or in the middle of a serious conversation, they expect you to answer their call and speak to them for as long as they want.
A protective partner is not bad at all. But when their protective side goes into a scary one and they start displaying most of these signs of an overprotective and dominating partner, then you should talk to them right away. Remember communication is like oxygen in any relationship. Whatever you feel should be communicated to your partner so that you both are on the same page.
Edit- Parul Srivastava