Sex & Relationship

Can A Big Fat Wedding Guarantee a Happy Marriage?

Indians are obsessed with Big Fat Weddings, Can A Big Fat Wedding Guarantee a Happy Marriage?


Marriage: a union of two people, and in Indian culture, a unison of two families, who have put forward as a step to partner each other for the rest of their lives. It is a relationship that’s made on the basis of personal choices and understanding of the two people who are supposed to live together for the rest of their lives. But over the years, the idea of marriage is settling to be in the conundrum of being a lifelong event or a one-day gala. The obsession with a big fat wedding is such that the idea that does a big fat wedding guarantee a happy marriage doesn’t come to their mind often or is perhaps overlooked.

big fat wedding

Marriage vs wedding, an often overlooked idea

Marriage is a long-term commitment to being in a relationship with your partner. A wedding is a ceremony marking the beginning of the marriage. Talking about the cultural exchanges, the line between these two terms is blurring in a way that the entire idea of marriage is centering on throwing a big fat wedding.

Of course, weddings are a celebration, a remarkable day for the couple to cherish and make memories of the day from when they started their journey together. But can a beautiful big fat wedding guarantee a happy marriage? Why do people spend everything, or even go into debt just to make a memory? In fact, people have managed to celebrate big fat weddings even in a deadly COVID pandemic. So, what’s this obsession with the big fat weddings?  

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A Big Fat Wedding is not for the bride and groom, but for the people

“On a wedding, there are hundreds and thousands of people who come to see the bride-groom and give them their blessings. How can we let them just come and be? The maligned idea of showing off is sugarcoated under this idea, that a guest should be served to the best of our capacities” – Pooja Aggarwal, sharing her experience of how the idea of big fat weddings is.

big fat wedding

The quality of the Big Fat Wedding will define the standard of the Bride Side

“Patriarchy can’s leave the idea of a wedding, especially when it’s an arranged marriage. In Indian culture, the wedding event is meant to be sponsored by the bride-side. Where dowry is criminalized, the unofficial things and expenses the bride side is made to bear are uncountable. And the nicer the bride-side makes the wedding, the better would be their impression, on the groom-side, and on the people who are going to attend the wedding.” Pooja added.

A big fat wedding is an event to validate social standard

For the people who celebrate and believe in big fat weddings, or them, it is a validation that they are securing their social standard. The idea that what will people think if they will not throw a wedding keeps crossing their minds. These ideas range from – people should know who is the bride/ groom at the wedding as otherwise, people will deduce their own meanings about the bride/ groom to the judgments about the economic status and hospitality culture of the hosts of the wedding.

CRUX: Basically, a wedding is an occasion that’s to celebrate a new beginning and help people think, what they should be thinking about the bride-groom and the hosting families. It’s basically to feed the people an idea that this relation will be a good marriage as a big fat wedding is apparently been pulled off. And well, who cares, if a big fat wedding guarantees a happy marriage?

Marriage, from the wedding day, becomes a lifelong process, and nothing can really guarantee if a marriage will be successful or not. In fact, it is a journey of ups and downs, so, how can this be guaranteed even. Of course, celebrations are important. But what good can pleasing people do, especially in the instances where a wedding becomes a tool of a family’s financial and mental state. In fact, the expense expelled on the big fat wedding, if channelized for the future planning of the bridegroom’s life; can result in at least a financially stable marriage.

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Ishika Aggarwal

Can write, shoot, listen, talk and procrastinate. A feminist at heart, Ishika is an avid writer and multimedia person who loves talking about women, realism, and society. When not working she is either seen watching films or making one.
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