Sex & Relationship

Break the ice on the first night of the wedding with these conversation starters

Real intimacy in marriage is not just about having sex on the very first day. It’s all about connecting with your partner in all areas like mentally, emotionally, spiritually.


Couples’ first night after marriage is something they will remember for the rest of their life. There are so many things they should know and understand before they experience theirs after wedding excitement.

You see, here is the thing!

It’s more than just about the sex because, after all those tiring ceremonies and photo clicks, this is the time when you finally get a chance to be with each other without the lights, family, friends, and of course guests.

No matter if it’s an arranged or love marriage, the feeling is totally new and different for the ones who got married and with this new feeling of being alone with him/her on your special night, comes a set of doubts and questions which you may feel awkward about asking someone.

So here we are, with all the answers to all the little queries that couples might have.

Tips from married couples which will help you to connect with your partner in all areas during your first wedding night:

Read more: Cupid over Covid! This is why couples are loving home weddings

first night of the wedding
Image source – Canva

1. Are you tired?: It clearly means that he/she just wants to relax in your arms. Not a hard thing to understand that not everyone is up for the first wedding night sex.  Many couples actually don’t do it on the first night because the wedding ceremonies and rituals go on till late in the night and people can get exhausted. So, no, you’re not wrong if you want to wait for the right time, right place with the right setting. There is no point letting the stress of the first night get to you because it’s always the best to make love when you truly want to.

2. Ask each other’s best moments from the wedding: Since wedding functions are all about creating memories, you can ask your partner and know how they felt about those moments. There can be some happy memories, some emotional, sad, and also a few intimate that you and your partner can cherish throughout your married life. Talking, laughing, sharing, and reliving your favourite moments from your wedding saga brings you emotionally and physically close to your partner.

3. Communicate: You should try to know more about your partner and the easiest way to do that is to talk and share things like knowing each other’s likes and dislikes, morning/day/night routine, favourite music, and travel plans. The more you share, the more you will get to know about your partner which will ultimately make you comfortable around your partner. You can start asking stuff like how you feel about getting married or if he/she wants to head straight off to a honeymoon destination, or consider spending your first night in your new home.

4. Make your partner comfortable: Ask your partner if he/she is tired and if you can do something to make him/her feel better. It can be anything from making any snack to massage the forehead. Dealing with such a situation helps you to get closer to your partner. Make him/her good bedding, care for him/her with a coffee or anything they wish, after all, it is both of you till eternity.

5. Wedding night gift: Perhaps, not a mandatory thing to do but sure it will make your partner happy and feel wonderfully precious. However, the gift doesn’t have to be expensive, as it is just a gesture that he/she will cherish for the rest of the life because if he/she really loves you, no matter what you give, a gift will make the moment perfect and eventually will give you both something to talk about.

6. Take tips from other couples: There’ll always be your good friends who got married earlier than you or an elder sister, cousin, sister in law, or even your mother who may be ready to give you tips and clear your doubts about your wedding night, such as what precautions you should need, and common things to keep in mind, etc.

7. Complement each other: Since it is your wedding so both of you (the bride and the groom) will get compliments for the wedding looks by family and friends throughout the ceremonies. However, the only compliment the couple may eagerly seek is from their spouse-to-be. So, this would be a perfect way to break the ice on marriage first night by complimenting each other on marriage.

8. Discuss Chores: For the grooms, it doesn’t have to be this quick but your partner (bride) may get nervous about these kinds of stuff by wondering how the morning schedule should go. So, whatever your morning chores consist of, it’s always helpful to discuss on the marriage first night and don’t let your bride do all the daily chores all by herself. This will make your bride super comfortable.

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